Yesterday was teach Hillary How to cook and clean like a proud Dixie Housewife Day. My friends here have claimed that yours truly has spent too much time out of Dixie and has been corrupted by the dirty Yankees (quite literally I may add). It started with cleaning techniques. Not the reasonable pick shit up and put it n the same vincity of where it goes but rather the time consuming and exhausting move everything out of the way and actually clean method. Or the more aptly demonstrate while Hillary watches method. I watched for about 4 whole hours. At the end I was sufficiently exhausted and was all ready to order a pizza and play World of Warcraft. But alas, Said friend wanted to COOK a meal. My experience with cooking started at an early age at school but ended when I went up "north". I have forgotten almost everything. I am not even sure how long it took to make a meal of homemade biscuits fried chicken and peach cobbler and a bunch of other stuff. My protests that "up North" we have things called restraunts that we can go to where we can be served and they will do all the grunt work were met with...Hillary you are a southern woman, if you want a man...
Finally dinner was finished 2 and something hours later. As we all sat down it was discussed if the days lesson had been successful.
"It is a start, we can go into more depth on Saturday."

Whenever I have to use relay to talk to someone here in KY I usually get xxxxxx(cant understand)xxxxx
see, KY people do talk funny.
And yes I am fully aware that this includes myself also.

There are only a few things that truly piss me off in this world and windstream broadband is now one of them. On Wednesday the internet went off. That is fine i can go a couple of hours without internet. The days stretched out and it is now Sat and I am at my uncle's using dial up. Every time I call I get put on hold and told again and again that they are working on it. Well hell, they have said that for three days now. Their service to Deaf people is poor too. When mom calls them she gets put on hold for maybe 10 mins. when I called i got put on hold for a hour. Believe me they got an earful from me (technically the relay operator but you get my drift).  Then they offered me a month free.
Hello you dumb asses you cant upgrade your servers without causing a three day outage  how am I supposed to know that my free mouth is because you too stupid to handle a routine upgrade and you have no idea when it will be fixed?
At that point I started wondering if maybe windstream outsourced the technical help and I am getting someone from.,say, India and they really do not know how to deal with veiled threats of reporting them to the National association of the Deaf, of which I am a card carrying member of. So I decide to break it down into simple terms
"I am pissed at windstream and if you was not the only broadband company around in this part of KY I would have went bye-bye  on Friday. All of your "technical people are not helpful. I am not sure where you get your employees..."
then I shut up because the other person on the line is an employee and insulting his or her intelligence would not be feasible at this moment in time so I try another track,
"Are you really in America or are you in India and you have no idea in Hades where eastern KY is and that is why you keep going "We are working on it" over and over like a scratched and broken Elvis record?"
 "well, ummmm...ummmm"
I felt a twisted sort of pleasure at having finally stumped the "IT person"
Then, is your "degree" really in IT or is it in like communications or English?
My mother who unknown to me was reading over my shoulder then told me that I was now just being mean and there was no need for that. And you know for once I had to admit she was right, even if the so called IT person was a dimwit who does not know a modem from his ass he technically is not gonna be able to fix the issue himself.
So I bid him farewell and wondered if he has a blog somewhere where he is writing about the client from hell.